Tuesday, January 12, 2010

just dad...

john, jay, dad, grampa (only by the dogs, but it still counts), big papa, pops, senior, chief...these are just a few of the names that john nicholas breier will respond to...right now i prefer to call him Superman...because my dad is fucking awesome!!!

dad was diagnosed with esophageal cancer a week before christmas...(damnit!!!)so with that in mind johnny and i went christmas shopping for dad...we found a pair of 'tighty whiteys' with the Superman logo on them...unfortunately they only had huge fat man and little boy sizes...but we knew then what we were looking for...we were able to find him a Superman t-shirt and LAC gave him a Superman pin to wear to the first doctor appointment...that way the cancer would know that he was gonna kick the shit out of it...

for those of you who don't know my dad, let me give you a brief description of him...imagine me - but with more hair and a slightly higher sperm count...i have been daddy's little girl since the beginning...i was such a tomboy growing up (i know it's hard to imagine) and i hurt myself A LOT...but i didn't run to mom, i ran to my daddy...and he somehow always made it feel better...in junior and senior high school he NEVER missed any of my basketball games...at age 19, when i came out to him and mom, he said 'sweet, now we can go to the titty bars together'...when amy and i had only been married for a month and it came time to make a decision about mom's medical care - my brother, my dad and myself sequestored ourselves away from the rest of the family...dad looked at me and my brother and said 'where's amy???she's a part of this family and has a say about this too'...we have spent countless hours together at the pub talking about nothing and everything all at the same time...pretty much the best way to describe my dad is 'fucking awesome' (as i've said before)

in the past few weeks i've found myself using words i hoped i would never have to use in my life...words like chemotherapy, radiologist and feeding tube...but these are the facts of life (and not the good kind with joe and tootie)...this is what my dad and my family are up against...but i KNOW how strong my dad is...and i KNOW the power of positive thought...and although i don't believe in prayer and religion - i'll take whatever we can get at this point...when dad told me he had cancer, as my hands were shaking so bad i couldn't even write, he told me 'i'll fight this like a mother fucker'...ummm duh...

some men become fathers by mistake...some fathers don't ever become men...my dad is a father and a great man because he WANTS to be...for better or worse, he is the reason i am who i am today and i couldn't imagine it any other way...

dad - i love you...i know you'll beat this...not because you have to, but because you want to...

3 comments:

Lee Ann said...

Okay, I'm not going to lie and say not many things move me to tears, cause you know me. But I must say this is the sweetest testament of love. I know your dad, loved him from the second I meet him. He will beat this how could he not with all the surrounding him. Love you, Love
Dad.

Sue said...

As I said not long ago (last night I believe) Big Rhonda is a very insightful and wonderful daughter. Your dad is awesome and a fighter and I truly believe with the help of his family and friends he will kick this things ass. My thought and prayers are with you and the family as you deal with this. I do believe in God even with everything I've been through and also what's meant to be and I know in my heart your dad WILL kick this thing.
Love you guys.
Sue

Ms. Thomas said...

Kick its ass, Big Daddy. I'm sending out good vibes and sunny thoughts for you all. Stay strong.