so i say 'go jets'
amy says 'go colts'
johnny says 'go breakfast at tiffany's...it's on today at 4'
i guess we all have something to look forward to on sunday afternoons...
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
just dad...
john, jay, dad, grampa (only by the dogs, but it still counts), big papa, pops, senior, chief...these are just a few of the names that john nicholas breier will respond to...right now i prefer to call him Superman...because my dad is fucking awesome!!!
dad was diagnosed with esophageal cancer a week before christmas...(damnit!!!)so with that in mind johnny and i went christmas shopping for dad...we found a pair of 'tighty whiteys' with the Superman logo on them...unfortunately they only had huge fat man and little boy sizes...but we knew then what we were looking for...we were able to find him a Superman t-shirt and LAC gave him a Superman pin to wear to the first doctor appointment...that way the cancer would know that he was gonna kick the shit out of it...
for those of you who don't know my dad, let me give you a brief description of him...imagine me - but with more hair and a slightly higher sperm count...i have been daddy's little girl since the beginning...i was such a tomboy growing up (i know it's hard to imagine) and i hurt myself A LOT...but i didn't run to mom, i ran to my daddy...and he somehow always made it feel better...in junior and senior high school he NEVER missed any of my basketball games...at age 19, when i came out to him and mom, he said 'sweet, now we can go to the titty bars together'...when amy and i had only been married for a month and it came time to make a decision about mom's medical care - my brother, my dad and myself sequestored ourselves away from the rest of the family...dad looked at me and my brother and said 'where's amy???she's a part of this family and has a say about this too'...we have spent countless hours together at the pub talking about nothing and everything all at the same time...pretty much the best way to describe my dad is 'fucking awesome' (as i've said before)
in the past few weeks i've found myself using words i hoped i would never have to use in my life...words like chemotherapy, radiologist and feeding tube...but these are the facts of life (and not the good kind with joe and tootie)...this is what my dad and my family are up against...but i KNOW how strong my dad is...and i KNOW the power of positive thought...and although i don't believe in prayer and religion - i'll take whatever we can get at this point...when dad told me he had cancer, as my hands were shaking so bad i couldn't even write, he told me 'i'll fight this like a mother fucker'...ummm duh...
some men become fathers by mistake...some fathers don't ever become men...my dad is a father and a great man because he WANTS to be...for better or worse, he is the reason i am who i am today and i couldn't imagine it any other way...
dad - i love you...i know you'll beat this...not because you have to, but because you want to...
dad was diagnosed with esophageal cancer a week before christmas...(damnit!!!)so with that in mind johnny and i went christmas shopping for dad...we found a pair of 'tighty whiteys' with the Superman logo on them...unfortunately they only had huge fat man and little boy sizes...but we knew then what we were looking for...we were able to find him a Superman t-shirt and LAC gave him a Superman pin to wear to the first doctor appointment...that way the cancer would know that he was gonna kick the shit out of it...
for those of you who don't know my dad, let me give you a brief description of him...imagine me - but with more hair and a slightly higher sperm count...i have been daddy's little girl since the beginning...i was such a tomboy growing up (i know it's hard to imagine) and i hurt myself A LOT...but i didn't run to mom, i ran to my daddy...and he somehow always made it feel better...in junior and senior high school he NEVER missed any of my basketball games...at age 19, when i came out to him and mom, he said 'sweet, now we can go to the titty bars together'...when amy and i had only been married for a month and it came time to make a decision about mom's medical care - my brother, my dad and myself sequestored ourselves away from the rest of the family...dad looked at me and my brother and said 'where's amy???she's a part of this family and has a say about this too'...we have spent countless hours together at the pub talking about nothing and everything all at the same time...pretty much the best way to describe my dad is 'fucking awesome' (as i've said before)
in the past few weeks i've found myself using words i hoped i would never have to use in my life...words like chemotherapy, radiologist and feeding tube...but these are the facts of life (and not the good kind with joe and tootie)...this is what my dad and my family are up against...but i KNOW how strong my dad is...and i KNOW the power of positive thought...and although i don't believe in prayer and religion - i'll take whatever we can get at this point...when dad told me he had cancer, as my hands were shaking so bad i couldn't even write, he told me 'i'll fight this like a mother fucker'...ummm duh...
some men become fathers by mistake...some fathers don't ever become men...my dad is a father and a great man because he WANTS to be...for better or worse, he is the reason i am who i am today and i couldn't imagine it any other way...
dad - i love you...i know you'll beat this...not because you have to, but because you want to...
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
just amy...
ames, mama, mama 2, michelle, baby, chef, lesbin (not a typo), keebler, bitch-hole (from my brother)...these are just a few of the names that amy michelle harris will respond to...this year has brought big changes to my relationship with amy...all for the better, i might add...but the one thing that has not changed (and never will) is how much i rely on her...
my family is going through some issues right now that i won't go into here...some issues that have kicked me in the gut and dropped me to my knees...and while most people are telling me not to cry and be strong, amy is the one who is holding me while i cry and picking me up when i fall...she silently reaches her hand out to mine and lets me breakdown...i don't know if it's because she doesn't know what to say and do or if it's because she knows better than to tell me how to feel...either way i don't care...
i didn't see the changes coming and i was totally not prepared for any of them...many of these changes involved my relationship with amy...but through it all, amy has been the one who keeps me going...i'm not quite sure how i would have survived this past week without her...
so - ames, mama, chef - i love you and thank you for being such a huge part of my life...i know it's different from what we thought it would be, but i love you very much and could not imagine my life without you...
go on with your honky ass!!!
my family is going through some issues right now that i won't go into here...some issues that have kicked me in the gut and dropped me to my knees...and while most people are telling me not to cry and be strong, amy is the one who is holding me while i cry and picking me up when i fall...she silently reaches her hand out to mine and lets me breakdown...i don't know if it's because she doesn't know what to say and do or if it's because she knows better than to tell me how to feel...either way i don't care...
i didn't see the changes coming and i was totally not prepared for any of them...many of these changes involved my relationship with amy...but through it all, amy has been the one who keeps me going...i'm not quite sure how i would have survived this past week without her...
so - ames, mama, chef - i love you and thank you for being such a huge part of my life...i know it's different from what we thought it would be, but i love you very much and could not imagine my life without you...
go on with your honky ass!!!
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
just francis...
a few months ago my brother heard about a stray dog that had appeared at somebody's house...this poor little guy (who they called 'stranger') was pretty bad off...he had mange and scabs and sores all over his poor little body...he didn't look good...we drove out to bfe to meet him and just the sight of him made me want to cry...
but the best thing about him was that he didn't care that he smelled bad and was pretty nasty looking...he was just happy to be alive...so my brother took him home that day...he bathed him every other day with special 'mange shampoo' and nursed him back to health...now he's a happy, healthy, horny little boy...
he still had his 'manhood' when johnny got him...and every time johnny had an appointment to snip him, something came up that required the money he had set aside...finally tuesday was the day...so while i sit at the pub drinking my tuesday beers i get this text -
"This bitch was all nice and shit then she gave me a roofie and cut off my balls! - francis"
a still want to know how he used the phone without thumbs...
Monday, August 17, 2009
just now...
so it's apparently just now hitting me that my marriage is over...it's not like i've been in denial or anything...i guess it's because things between me and amy have been so good...better than they have been in a while actually...i guess it's the realization that nobody in my entire life has known so much about me and loved me anyway...i don't know how to say this and have it not come out like i'm an ass so here goes...it's not that i miss amy being my wife...it's that i miss having a wife...don't get me wrong, i love amy now as much as i did when we first met, but the marriage part just wasn't working out for either of us...and we both know it...we know that we made the right decision, but that doesn't make it any easier...i would rather have amy in my life forever as one of my best friends, than my wife for the next 2 years and not at all after that...it's just that i felt like i was living in a box for the past few years and now that i'm not in that box anymore, i don't know what to do with myself...i have the independence that i wanted, but i'm not sure what to do with it...it's hard to look forward to the future when it's so uncertain...i know that nothing is certain, but geez, i really don't know what to do now...i am having to re-live all the self discovery that i did in my early twenties (which yes, was a long time ago)...i didn't like going through it then and i don't like going through it now...i have depended on amy for so much for so long...a month after we got married my mom died...a year after that (almost to the day) my grandmother died...and a year after that (to the day) my cousin died...it's hard to find your footing when someone else has carried you for so long...in situations like this, my first instinct is to run...but now i don't have anywhere or anybody to run to...this is something that i thought i wouldn't have to do again, but alas (that's for lollie) i do...and it's a journey that i have to make alone because if i can't figure out what's going on in my head, you sure as hell can't either...
Monday, July 13, 2009
just my sissy...
for those of you who haven't had the pleasure of meeting my brother - you don't know what you are missing...he is one of the funniest people i have ever met...he also has the same fucked up sense of humor as i do, so he doesn't judge my jacked up remarks about dead people, or old people, or religion, or any of the many things i make fun of...so with that being said i offer you this little bit of his mind...
From:
John Breier [john.breier@gmail.com]
Sent: 7/12/2009 7:45:31 PM
To: Jessica Breier; Amy Harris:
Subject: Dinner
Don't put jalapeno in your hamburger helper, it will make you shart..............
From:
John Breier [john.breier@gmail.com]
Sent: 7/12/2009 7:45:31 PM
To: Jessica Breier; Amy Harris:
Subject: Dinner
Don't put jalapeno in your hamburger helper, it will make you shart..............
Monday, June 29, 2009
just an open letter...
i will always remember the first night we met...
i will always remember every night we spent together at mia's listening to mother jane...
i will always remember the dinners at charlie browns...
i will always remember helping you create and manage your very first website...
i will always remember dragging you to hockey games with my family...
i will always remember you dropping paint on my mom's hallway carpet...
i will always remember the hard boiled egg you shoved in my face...
i will always remember coming home to you making a big pot of chili in a house you didn't even live in...
i will always remember falling in love with you and not being able to admit it to anyone, not even myself...
i will always remember the drive back from buddha belly when i finally admitted i was falling in love with you...
i will always remember laying in bed, with my heart pounding so hard you thought i was having a heart attack and asking you to marry me...
i will always remember where we were exactly 7 years ago today...
i will always remember the week we spent in the cabin in michigan, just you and i...
i will always remember needing you so much when my mom died that i could feel it all the way down to my toes...
i will always remember how i needed you when my grandmother died a year later...
i will always remember how i needed you another year later when my cousin died...
i will always remember how i needed you when we found out my father had prostate cancer...
i will always remember the night i realized that we shouldn't be in a relationship anymore...
i will always remember how it felt like mike tyson had punched me in the stomach when we both said it out loud...
the one thing that i don't have to remember is my love for you...you don't remember love...it just is...my love for you is not something that i have to remember...it just is...it has come into my life and it will never go away...as difficult as this is for both of us, we will get through it...with love...for and from each other...for and from our family...for and from our friends...
i will always remember every night we spent together at mia's listening to mother jane...
i will always remember the dinners at charlie browns...
i will always remember helping you create and manage your very first website...
i will always remember dragging you to hockey games with my family...
i will always remember you dropping paint on my mom's hallway carpet...
i will always remember the hard boiled egg you shoved in my face...
i will always remember coming home to you making a big pot of chili in a house you didn't even live in...
i will always remember falling in love with you and not being able to admit it to anyone, not even myself...
i will always remember the drive back from buddha belly when i finally admitted i was falling in love with you...
i will always remember laying in bed, with my heart pounding so hard you thought i was having a heart attack and asking you to marry me...
i will always remember where we were exactly 7 years ago today...
i will always remember the week we spent in the cabin in michigan, just you and i...
i will always remember needing you so much when my mom died that i could feel it all the way down to my toes...
i will always remember how i needed you when my grandmother died a year later...
i will always remember how i needed you another year later when my cousin died...
i will always remember how i needed you when we found out my father had prostate cancer...
i will always remember the night i realized that we shouldn't be in a relationship anymore...
i will always remember how it felt like mike tyson had punched me in the stomach when we both said it out loud...
the one thing that i don't have to remember is my love for you...you don't remember love...it just is...my love for you is not something that i have to remember...it just is...it has come into my life and it will never go away...as difficult as this is for both of us, we will get through it...with love...for and from each other...for and from our family...for and from our friends...
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